February Sermon Illustrations

February 15, 2010

Burying Dead Church Members

A funeral for dead church members was held last Sunday in the Christian Church at Jackson, Miss., at which time the pastor, the Rev. James N. Faulconer, placed the names of fifty inactive church members in a small artificial casket. In announcing his novel theme, this alert young pastor stated that "when one ceases to function in the church program, he is dead, and it is time for his funeral." This is nothing more nor less than plain truth, no matter how much some church members may dislike it.

The workers in a beehive sting the drones to death and get rid of these lazy parasites. But drones in a congregation may refuse to work or neglect to pay and still sit in the "amen" corner and get credit for being veritable pillars of the church.

As for the carping critics who talk their heads off telling the world what is wrong with the preacher and the church, it is very seldom that these worthies are either able or willing to offer a constructive suggestion. The "holding back strap" of horse and buggy days was a necessary part of the harness, but it was the traces and the collar that carried the load. The more church members there are in Hattiesburg and South Mississippi who are pulling, the faster we will move toward the kingdom of heaven.

Here is the full list of "dead ones" as announced by Jackson's live wire, Jimmy Faulconer. As you read it, spend more time in asking whether any of the names fit you than in seeking to tag some other fellow:

The names of those read to the congregation were: John Backslider, Anna Lukewarm, Margaret Indecision, Alma Gossiper, Jim Knocker, Edith Never Help, John I. Dolittle, Henry Never Pay, FrankNon-Missionary, Harry It Can't Be Done, Lizza Sunday Headache, Judas Iscariot, who sold the church for gain, Tom I-Know-It-All, Rachel Joy Killer, Carl Changeable, Maul I-Can't, George Sleep Late, Fritz Some Day, Mrs. I. Am Wise, Cliff Selfishness, Florence Sensuality, Arthur Appetite, Maud Hatred, Homer Temper, Stella Impatience, Robert I-Am-Busy, and the Critical Family of six who are: Harry, who thinks the preacher preaches too long; Jane, who thinks the pastor should call oftener; Ike, who thinks the church has too many calls for missionary help; Callie, who doesn't like the choir; and Glenn, who thinks there are hypocrites on the official board of the church.Selected.

Subjects: Church, Church Membership, Church Attendance

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