Teacher (patiently): "If one and one make two, and two and two make four, how much do four and four make?"

Reluctant pupil: "That's not fair, teacher. You answered the easy ones yourself and gave me the hard one."—The Lookout

The teacher in a little backwoods school was at the blackboard explaining arithmetic problems. She was delighted to see her dullest pupil giving slack-jawed attention, which was unusual for him. Her happy thought was that, at last, the gangling lad was beginning to understand.

When she finished, she said to him, "You were so interested, Cicero, that I'm sure you want to ask some questions."

"Yes'm," drawled Cicero, "I got one to ask. Where do them figgers go when you rub 'em off?"—Sunshine Magazine

Our daughter, Dala, a second-grader, was practicing some subtraction problems at home. I was asked to pose some problems to be handled without pencil and paper. I began "seven take-away six equals what?" These she could do so I finally slipped in "nine take-away ten equals what?" Without much thought, she replied "one." "Now, think," I urged, and I repeated the problem. This time she said, "You can't do it!"

"That's better," I said and hastened to add that there is an alge-braic answer. "But," I went on, "you won't have Algebra until grade nine, probably."

"Oh, don't be too sure," expostulated Dala, "Miss Bennett will probably give it to us; we have everything else!"—Dale Baughman

Teacher: "If coal is $25 a ton, how many tons would you get for $100?"

Pupil: "Oh, about 31/2 tons."

Teacher: "That isn't right."

Pupil: "I know, but I wish you would convince our coal man."

Mother was discussing with the mathematics teacher her child's slow progress in algebra. "It isn't that he refuses to try," she said. "I rather think he just doesn't believe it at all."—Weekly News, New Zealand

Miss Oglesby, an elementary school teacher, found that none of her pupils could translate into numerals the two plain words on the blackboard, "One million."

So, she wrote down the numerals 1,000,000 and asked if anyone knew what was represented.

In the center of the class room Johnny jumped to his feet and waved eagerly for recognition.

"Yes, John?" said the teacher, somewhat relieved.

"Miss Oglesby, I know what that is."

"Good, John; I'm glad one knows, at least. Explain to the others the meaning of those symbols on the blackboard."

"Yes, ma'am," said Johnny eagerly. "That's a stick layin’ beside six hula hoops!"—Len Robin, Quote

"He seems to be very clever."

"Yes, indeed, he can even do the problems that his children have to work out at school."

Sonny: "Aw, pop, I don't wanter study arithmetic."

Pop: "What! a son of mine grow up and not he able to figure up baseball scores and batting averages? Never!"

Teacher: "Now, Johnny, suppose I should borrow $100 from your father and should pay him $10 a month for ten months, how much would I then owe him?"

Johnny: "About $3 interest."

"See how I can count, mama," said Kitty. "There's my right foot. That's one. There's my left foot. That's two. Two and one make three. Three feet make a yard, and I want to go out and play in it!"

"Two old salts who had spent most of their lives on fishing smacks had an argument one day as to which was the better mathematician," said George C. Wiedenmayer the other day. "Finally the captain of their ship proposed the following problem which each would try to work out: 'If a fishing crew caught 500 pounds of cod and brought their catch to port and sold it at 6 cents a pound, how much would they receive for the fish?'

"Well, the two old fellows got to work, but neither seemed able to master the intricacies of the deal in fish, and they were unable to get any answer.

"At last old Bill turned to the captain and asked him to repeat the problem. The captain started off: 'If a fishing crew caught 500 pounds of cod and—.'

"'Wait a moment,' said Bill, 'is it codfish they caught?'

"'Yep,' said the captain.

"'Darn it all,' said Bill. 'No wonder I couldn't get an answer. Here I've been figuring on salmon all the time.'"